Saturday, January 2, 2010

Full Blue Moon

Happy Blue Moon! Happy New Year!! The blue moon is the second full moon of the month and my daughter and her new husband picked that day to be married because they found the love that only comes once in a blue moon so couldn't resist the date (also, of course, as a nod to John)

I am so sorry that this post is so late...I did think I could squeeze it in on the 31st but that just didn't happen. I now realize there was a reason for that...my inspiration for the post didn't really come to me until about 9 PM...when I heard the song that my daughter and her new husband chose for their first song as husband and wife! I only cried twice that night..once when I heard John's beloved Mary sing the Ave Maria in church (not only was her voice beyond anything you have ever heard I knew that if he were here with us he would have been the one to play a song written especially for his sister, just as he did for his "adopted" sister Katie, when she was married in the same church. I was happy that Mary could stand in for him...

Then we got to the reception and Lauren and Tom began their first dance...I was expecting the song about loving you more than ice cream (Tom's family owns a driving range and an ice cream stand) but I was hearing one of my favorite songs that John wrote! And then I looked at the band and noticed that all of John's friends from Syracuse and Hamilton went behind the instruments and singing!! All of John's life Lauren and I got to listen to his first takes ... and every time he would ask us to listen she would ask him...is this the one about me?? Well, little did we know that the song he wrote about another would also be for her!! The song's title was "love is a sweet surprise" and it is so beautiful...I have been searching for the lyrics today but can't find them...guess he doesn't want to share just yet. It is a lovely piece about a boy who "never was, and never will be a guy who gets girls with lines" and that is just what her Tom is...so much like John...funny, smart, sensitive and genuine. They are so much in love...something she thought would never happen to her...a sweet surprise.

so, my thoughts for this new year are to never, ever, give up hope...and trust that there is someone always looking after you. It is a very difficult thing to do...believe me....but I know that it is true...John gave us a beautiful boy who loves our daughter, a wonderful family for her to belong to, and a unforgettable night with all our friends by our side to celebrate with...
I know that life has more difficulties ahead for me...but I am going to hold on to wonderful moments that are given and think of them as just what they are...gifts...to keep you going when you are down and out...that is my wish for you...not just once in a blue moon...but every moon.
Happy New Year!

2 comments:

Cathy Geomelos said...

Dear Paula,
I just found this beautiful blog today. I am sitting here in tears reading each entry as if you were talking to me directly. Your words are as beautiful and strong as the love I remember you having for your children as they grew up. I can so vividly recall your daily stories about Lauren and John like they were yesterday. At the time, I only had 2 babies at home (with another on the way) and could not really relate to having "big kids" that were in middle and high school. What I do remember was how open and loving you were with them and how much joy they brought to you (even when they were driving you crazy!). At the time, I listened to the challenges you faced with them and admired how you handled each one. You do not know this, but now that my girls are growing and I am facing my own challenges with them, I often think of you and your wonderful way with John and Lauren. I am forced to be at Children's Hospital with my oldest daughter more than I care to talk about with her constant appointments, therapies and 15 (to date) surgeries. While I am there, instead of feeling sorry for myself or Tessa, I often think of you and others in my life that try constantly to simply love their families and do good in this world. My daughter is the most positive person one could ever meet and we learn from her everyday. I love that you ask others for small acts of kindness in honor of your son. He has helped my daughter and I through some tough times without even knowing it! Thank you for continuing to share your thoughts with us and for keeping your son's memory alive. You are a mom that has achieved what many of us can only hope for. I wish you and your family love and peace in the New Year.
Love, Cathy Geomelos

adam said...

we have the lyrics paula. and i can speak for all of us and say that your post means the world to us. i'm super pumped that our performance moved you as much as it did US! i'll forward you an email with the lyrics of that beautiful song.